Rollercoaster
by CaitlinNicole
Summary: It’s 2000, and Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter are together in a rather odd and awkward relationship. Things don’t go quite as planned and both Draco and Harry find themselves strapped into an emotional rollercoaster ride.
1. Chapter 1

**Rollercoaster – Part One**

Flicking back long, blond hair, Draco waited impatiently at front of the Muggle theme park, along with Harry, Ron, Hermione, Blaise and Pansy.

"How much longer is this going to take?" he whined.

Hermione grinned at him, Blaise and Pansy nodded in agreement, Ron rolled his eyes, and Harry ignored him. Sighing softly, he leaned against the wall at his left side, and shut up, not wanting to aggravate Harry.

"So …" Blaise floundered, obviously uncomfortable with the silence that had settled over the six of them. "What is this place, anyway?"

"It's a theme park," Hermione explained. "It's one of the biggest Muggle tourist attractions around here."

"And why exactly do Muggles find it so interesting?" Pansy asked, eyeing a particularly muscular, hairy man smoking.

Hermione shrugged. "That's what we're here to find out isn't it?" she said, smiling at the other woman's impatience as they proceeded forward in the line, and finally made it to the counter.

A bored, 30 something year old woman sat in the little enclosure, sporadically checking her manicured nails, and doing her job with as little enthusiasm as possible.

"Tickets for six adults, please," Harry said as they all crowded around the small counter, not wasting any time with pleasantries.

Glaring at him, she named the price, and gave him the tickets as soon as he handed over the Muggle money. Harry had refused to let any of them pay for their own ticket, and had told them that if they even tried to talk their way out of it, he'd make sure they got the seeing to of a lifetime.

Draco rather thought he'd enjoy that seeing to.

Shaking the thought out of his head, he followed the others through a gate, where a Muggle man took their tickets, and suddenly, they was in the theme park.

Large buildings, in tacky colours surrounded him, and he stayed close to his friends, knowing that he'd get lost if he lost sight of them.

"The people who built these had absolutely no fashion sense," he complained. Everyone except Harry laughed, who simply shook his head in exasperation, with a small smile.

While the others decided what rides to go on, and which shows to see, Hermione slipped up to Draco's side.

"You haven't gone for it yet, I see," she observed. "I don't know what you're waiting for, Malfoy. Hundreds of other people are trying to get their hands on him."

Draco sighed. "You think I don't know that? It's just that he acts like we're not even sleeping together. I mean, I know we aren't actually going out or anything, but -" he faltered. "it would just be nice to know where I stand with him. He's sure as hell not giving me any clues about it."

Hermione shrugged. "There's only one way to find out," she advised knowingly.

"Can you just give me a hand?" he asked, exasperated.

"You need to do these sorts of things yourself, Draco." Hermione said, and left him to mull over the conversation with something akin to hopelessness.

"You're not going to chicken out, are you?" Harry teased, as Draco's eyes widened to the size of plates.

"Of course not," he scoffed, even as he stared at the rollercoaster with a mix of dread, and nausea. "And who says I'm going to be the one to chicken out, anyway? You could!"

"You're absolutely right," Harry said patronisingly, earning himself a glare from Draco.

"Oh shut up, Potter," he said, fully intending to give the other man an ear lashing.

"Will you two quit it!" Pansy interjected. "It's bad enough that we've been standing here for the last half an hour waiting our turn, without you two trying to bite each others heads off."

"But fighting with Harry soothes my soul, Pansy!" Draco replied with a grin.

"That's not what you said to me last week when you came crying to me because that fight you two had." Blaise said, and received a furious glower from Draco.

Trying to ignore Harry's curious gaze on him, Draco fidgeted, and broke eye contact with Blaise, his eyes coming to rest on Hermione. _Go on, _the look she sent him said. _This is an opportune moment. _Swallowing hard, he broke eye contact with her, too, and stared down at his shoes.

It wasn't that he didn't want to be with Harry - it was just that with so many people surrounding them, Draco _really _didn't want to bare his heart to Harry and risk having it trodden all over. And Draco wasn't sure that Harry liked him back, anyway. Damn it, this was so embarrassing. Why did he have to be the one to suffer from a particularly horrible case of unrequited love?

"So … Who thinks the Canons are going to win the next Quidditch Match?" Ron asked, trying to break the uneasy silence that had settled over the group. Draco was gratified to see that his method worked quite effectively.

Although Draco didn't know Ron well, and occasionally doubted he had a talent for anything, every so often Ron would proove without a doubt that he was capable of releasing the tension in a group. He was grateful this was one of those times.

**hdhdhd**

"Last chance to back out," Harry bantered playfully as he helped Draco lock himself into place in his chair, before locking himself into his own chair next to Draco.

"Not bloody likely, Potter," he said with a smirk thrown in the other man's direction.

"These seat things are uncomfortable!" Pansy complained from behind him.

"Suck it up," Draco replied. Next to him, Harry quietly sniggered.

_He looks so good, _Draco thought. _He looks happy. _And he truly did. Harry hadn't changed much since their final year at Hogwarts, except for a tolerance for Slytherins and what most of them had been through that slowly built until he was willing to offer friendship and support to a number of Slytherins; one of them was Draco.

_And I'm so glad I didn't turn him down._

"Earth to Draco." Harry's voice penetrated through Draco's daydream, and he cleared his head, looking quizzically at Harry. "We're about to go,"

"Thanks ever so much for reminding me," Draco snapped, and tried to clamp down on the queasiness he already felt.

And they were off.

**hdhdhd**

"You're an evil man," Draco told Harry for the thousandth time, his voice hoarse. "A wicked, mean, evil man."

"I know, I know," Harry said, rolling his eyes.

They were sitting down at one of the restaurants, waiting for Draco to rediscover his stomach. Hermione, Pansy and Blaise would sporadically fuss over him, and every so often Ron would jokingly send him a smirk that said '_Ha, ha, suffer!_'. But Harry had yet to display a single emotion about the way Draco was feeling.

_This isn't bloody fair_, he sulked to himself. _Unrequited love sucks._

"I'm starving," Pansy suddenly exclaimed. Her declaration was followed by Ron, Hermione and Harry's agreement. Draco sent them a disgruntled look.

"You people sicken me. How can you even think of eating already?" With a moan, he plonked his head on top of his arms on the table.

Someone nudged his foot under the table. Looking up, he saw Blaise giving him a secretive glance. "Why don't you guys go ahead," Blaise said, keeping his eyes trained on Draco the entire time. "I'll be with you in a moment."

Shrugging, the other four stood up, and went to order their food.

"What is it?" the blond asked inquisitively, ignoring his queasy stomach.

Blaise leaned forward at the table. "I don't know what the hell is wrong with you, Draco. All you need to do is _tell Harry that you want him. _He's such a Gryffindor sap that he'll be too busy shagging you out of your body to doubt you. What's the problem?"

"What – There is no – I – Why …" Draco trailed off.

Blaise raised an eyebrow. "I'm warning you, Draco. If you don't go for him – and damn _soon_ - someone else will."

And on that last, somewhat unhappy note, he left Draco sitting at the table, somehow feeling more nauseous than before.

"I know we're not that close, Malfoy, but you make Harry happy, so I'm willing to put up with you. The only thing is –"

"You're so sweet," Draco simpered.

Ron rolled his eyes. "I'm being serious, Malfoy. The only thing is that if you really want Harry, then you're going to have to do something about it soon. He's not going to stick around and wait, you know, and there are loads of other people who are interested in him–"

"For God's sake!" Draco yelled. "Is everyone intent on talking to me about the nonexistent relationship that I have with Harry? _I want him. _Is that what you want to hear? Well I'm not just saying it, it's true, too. _He doesn't want me back! _I can _deal _with it, alright! It's not like I need him or anything! So leave me alone, and let me deal with this my own way."

Ron gave him a sympathetic look.

"_AND STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT!"_ Draco added, storming over to Pansy.

"Thank God. At least there's one other sane person around here," he rambled to her.

"What is it, sweety?" she asked distractedly, inspecting an expensive bikini set – more importantly, how it looked on her, and less importantly, the price.

"Everyone keeps talking to me about my 'relationship' with Harry, and how it's threatened!" he exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air. "I mean, what is everyone's problem? It's not my fault he doesn't fancy me!"

"That's getting on the sulky side, there, darling." Pansy said, applying more lip gloss to her red lips before turning to face him. "Do you fancy him?" she asked, her brown eyes boring painfully into his own eyes.

_Oh god, I should have known better. It's a bloody conspiracy! They're all out to get me!_

"Well, yes." he said, scuffing the ground with his shoe.

"Do you want to be with him?"

"…Yeah."

"Alright then, Draco. You know, this is incredibly important to your happiness, so I'm _not _going to let you screw this up. I'm sick of seeing you unhappy, and if Potter's the one who can make you happy, then I'm going to _make sure _you get him."

"But he doesn't feel the same way, Pansy."

"You can't be sure of that, Draco. You've been shagging with him for what – four months now? You _know _Gryffindors get attached easily."

Slumping down, Draco nodded. "But how am I supposed to ask him? You know I'm not any good at these things. I don't even know what to say to him."

"That's all part of the master plan, honey." she winked at him, and for the first time, Draco thought that he might actually have a chance.

**hdhdhd**

"Thanks again, Harry," Hermione said, winking at Draco covertly, before stepping away from them, linking arms with Ronald and apparating away with a _pop. _

"So are you staying over tonight?" Harry asked him, filling in the silence that had taken over.

"I don't know. Do you want me to?" he replied with a smirk.

"Why not," the brunette said, shrugging. "I'm going to start cooking dinner."

Following him into the kitchen, Draco discovered once again, the fact that Harry actually was a good cook. He couldn't imagine himself doing the everyday mundane stuff Harry did. Draco had been brought up with house elves granting his every whim and wish, and as much as Hermione whinged at him and his other friends teased him about it, Draco was perfectly happy to let the house elves continue to take his orders – although now they were paid and got holidays, courtesy of Hermione's somewhat eccentric influence.

"Thanks for taking me today, Harry," Draco said, almost shyly when they were seated, the meal in front of them. He scooped up another mouthful of the beautiful pasta Harry had made them and swallowed it with glee. He loved Harry's cooking.

"I was happy to," Harry replied, before falling silent once again.

_Dammit, Potter! Why do you have to make this so hard for me? Why can't you just open up a little so I know what's going on in that big, stupid, cute, adorable head of yours! YOU'RE DRIVING ME INSANE!_

Draco was trying harder to get this to work than he'd ever tried in a relationship. It was so hard for him. He was a Malfoy, and usually, Malfoys were the ones who got chased, not the pursuers. Draco felt extremely vulnerable in this position, but Harry wouldn't let him get out of. He dropped every act that kept him safe from others in front of Harry even though it was often at his own expense, he regularly sent little presents, he was there for Harry whenever he needed him and he tried to stay away when he wanted to be alone. Everything he said, thought, felt and did was dependent on Harry.

And it seemed that everyone knew how Draco truly felt about Harry no matter hard he tried to reveal it. Although Draco often found this humiliating, he was coming to expect it and deal with it, simply because Harry was worth it. And though Draco might feel a little uncomfortable and out of place when with Harry, the thought of being alone was too much for him to handle, and the thought of being with anyone else was too much to stomach.

No one else could make Draco feel the things Harry made him feel. Harry was bloody brilliant, and Draco knew a lot of people thought he was too good for Draco. Nevertheless, other people's opinions had never really been of much concern to Harry and Draco was grateful for that one small blessing.

What frustrated him was the fact that no matter how hard Draco tried, Harry was never willing to go to the next level. And although he never _said _anything, the distance in those emerald eyes was obvious to anyone who was looking for it. He feared rejection and a fall out with Harry, and so he stayed silent, showing his affection and desire for the relationship to get serious in ways he knew Harry would find more acceptable.

Draco came out of his thoughts to see Harry looking at him in a predatory way.

"You have sauce on your lips," he explained with a completely straight face.

"I bet you can help me fix that," Draco said.

"I bet I could," Harry replied.

Leaning over, Harry kissed him gently. Draco pressed deeper into the kiss, and it became more passionate. Submitting to Harry's questing tongue, Draco felt them fumble their way to Harry's bed with a great deal of difficulty.

And it wasn't long until both were sprawled over said bed, sated and satisfied. Except for one thing ...

Draco rolled over on top of Harry, and nudged the brunette.

"What do you want?" he teased.

"Harry, you _know _my policy. You have to cuddle me now because I bottomed!"

"You always bottom," Harry snorted, nevertheless flinging an arm over Draco.

There was a brief silence. Then,

"Do not."

Propping himself up on one elbow, Harry raised an eyebrow. "Want me to prove that wrong?"

**hdhdhd**

"Just stay at home today! They don't need you at work!" Harry yelled over the top of the shower as Draco scrubbed himself as clean as he could in a short amount of time.

"Can't! My patients need me!" he yelled back.

He heard Harry's exasperated snort before the door slammed shut. Climbing out of the shower, he rubbed himself dry on a soft towel before jumping into his jeans and running out the door.

"I am so late it isn't funny," he told Harry, who had flopped back onto his bed, while pulling a jumper over his head. Kissing him chastely on the mouth before running out the door, he tried to ignore Harry calling out the things he would do for Draco, if he stayed home.

Stepping into the fireplace in Harry's lounge room after grabbing a handful of Floo Powder, Draco said clearly, "Work", and braced himself, trying to fend off disorientation before being spat out of his workplace's fireplace.

Taking a moment to regain his composure, he leant against the wall and closed his eyes.

"Master Malfoy, sir, we need a Healer down in the West Wing right away, sir. There is a witch having a serious allergic reaction to one of the potions you brewed, sir," a tiny, high pitched voice said – one of the hospital's house elves.

"Okay," Draco said tersely, waving the house elf away.

It was going to be a long day. Perhaps he should have listened to Harry after all.

**hdhdhd**

"Took your time getting back here," Harry complained as Draco threw himself down on Harry's couch with a sigh of exhaustion.

He peered up at Harry through his blond hair, annoyed. "Yeah, well, some of us have work to do." he snapped back.

Harry raised his eyebrows. "I see someone had a bad day."

Draco made a noncommital noise, and rolled over. "Sorry," he said somewhat sheepishly. "It was crappy, but I shouldn't take it out on you."

Harry shrugged. "Yeah, it's alright. But you better be staying over tonight." he said, and walked into the kitchen.

"I can do that." Draco replied, smiling.

"Oh, and Hermione and Ron are coming over to have dinner with us," Harry called out.

_Damn. Hermione will interrogate me again. And Ron probably will, too. Interfering Gryffindors ..._

"Hermione and Ron probably want you to themselves for a while," Draco said, following Harry into the kitchen. "They haven't seen you without me being nearby for almost a month, and they probably want their best friend back for a while."

Harry smiled and swooped down on Draco, kissing him softly on the lips. "You're sweet. Hermione said she wanted to go clubbing for a bit, though, so I said you'd come too. I know you love it, and you haven't been in ages."

Draco laughed, and Harry pulled him close in an embrace that shocked Draco. Harry hardly ever cuddled him or acted affectionate publically; and Draco viewed each and every singular act of affection as a reassurance that his decisions in the most recent part of his life were correct.

He sighed happily, and placed his own arms around Harry's narrow waist. "I love you," he said, and then froze -

Harry pulled back, and Draco's arms flopped back to his sides.

"Pardon?" the brunette said, far too calmly.

Draco's throat was tight, and he felt like he couldn't speak. "I-I -" he choked out -

_POP!_

Both Harry and Draco jumped as Ron and Hermione apparated in.

"We'll talk about it later," Harry said in a darkly promising sort of way, before greeting his best friends, and engaging in small talk.

Draco managed to nod politely at the Gryffindors, before excusing himself, and hiding in the bathroom.

He closed the door behind him, and slid down it, his back and neck resting against it as he sat on the cold tiled floor. _Holy shit, I cannot believe I just said that. How the hell am I going to explain this tonight? He'll jump at me about it, I know. And he won't let it go. _Draco banged his head against the door in frustration, and bit his lower lip. _What's really bad is now, Harry knows how I feel about him. Why, oh _why_ do I have to say everything that comes into my head? _

**hdhdhd**

"You're looking nice tonight, Draco," Hermione said pleasantly, when he'd found the courage to face all three of them again.

"And you look as stunning as ever," he replied truthfully, leaning over to kiss her cheek.

He looked up to see Ron staring expectantly at him. "Don't look at me like that, I'm not going to kiss your cheek as well," he teased.

The redhead shook the expression off his face, gave Draco a dirty look, and ignored him, bringing up a conversation with Harry.

"Seems like he's in a bit of a mood," Draco commented to Hermione, and she sniffed.

"No. He's just annoyed that you haven't worked up the courage to say something to Harry yet,"

Draco stiffened. "Not tonight," he hissed angrily.

Hermione looked shocked at his quiet, but nevertheless vibrant anger, before looking thoughtful. "If you say so, Draco," she said, and both of them turned back to their own thoughts.

_I wonder which nightclub Harry is going to take us to, _Draco wondered, and voiced his question.

"That Muggle one we all liked," Harry replied, and Draco vaguely recalled the place.

"Ah."

"Are we going yet?" Ron asked somewhat impatiently, and Harry chuckled.

"Right away, Your Highness."

**hdhdhd**

"You didn't say other people were coming too!" Draco whispered into Harry's ear.

The brunette shrugged. "I'm sorry, okay? I just forgot. It's not a disaster or anything."

Draco sighed, and looked around the place. People who had attended: Ginny Weasley, Blake Zabini, Pansy Parkinson, Dean Thomas, Seamus Finnagin, Zach Smith, Neville Longbottom, the Weasley twins, Luna Lovegood, and a number of other young people Draco didn't know.

"I'm going to go and get a drink," Draco said, pushing his way through a crowd of people to the bar. "Sex on the beach and Orgasm, please," he requested.

The barmaid raised her eyebrow at him. "Just tell me when," she purred teasingly before making and handing over the drinks.

Draco blushed and laughed, taking his drink, tipping the barmaid, and turned back towards Harry to see him -

_With. Another. Man._

Draco breathed in deep. _You're being paranoid, _he thought. _Harry wouldn't ever cheat on you._

He calmed himself down, feeling a little foolish, and walked over to Harry, handing over one of the drinks.

"Oh, hey Draco." Harry said, and kissed him on the forehead. Draco felt a rush of fierce possessive giddiness, before the strange man looked from Harry to Draco.

"Oh, are you two going out?" he asked, obviously surprised and no little dissappointed.

"Yes," Draco replied -

At the same time Harry said "No."

Draco's neck snapped as he suddenly looked up at Harry.

The strange men obviously felt the tension, because he began to back away. "Shit," was all he said.

It seemed like the whole club had become silent, and he and Harry were the focus of absolutely everyone's attention.

"What?" Harry asked, puzzled at Draco's heartbroken gaze.

The strange man swore yet again, and Draco could feel his, along with many other people's sympathetic gazes resting on him.

Draco felt a tear trickle down his cheek, and he brushed it away angrily. He gently placed his drink down on a table nearby him.

"I don't know why you lead me on, then, Harry." he said softer than he had meant to; nevertheless, the dull, heartbroken tone carried throughout the complex, and Draco saw Hermione rushing to the scene, obviously with the intention of fixing the problem.

He pivoted, and strode out the room, feet coming down far less firmer than he wanted them to, his posture more defeated than he wanted it to be, sobs escaping despite his impressive attempts of self control, and will for them to stop, tears trickling from his eyes.

"Draco! Draco, wait!" he heard several voices call, but ignored them, and slammed the door behind him.

Not even checking if anyone out in the street was watching him, he apparated himself back to Harry's place with a _pop._

He filched a bit of paper and a pen from Harry's office, he wrote one quick note, placing it gently on Harry's pillow in his bedroom.

That note would be his last to Harry.

**hdhdhd**

End of Part One.

CaitlinNicole


	2. Chapter 2

**Rollercoaster – Part Two**

_Shit. I can't remember the last time I've been this hung-over, _Draco thought as his temples throbbed, and his brain seemed to smash against his head with every movement.

He briefly considered not Healing himself to teach him a lesson, but decided that he'd be too irritable and take it out on Harry if he didn't.

Sighing, he turned his attention _inwards _and then firmly _cancelled _all the poisonous-like substance out of his system. Normally he pushed out the alcohol, but this way was far more comfortable for him, and he had enough energy to spare to keep himself comfortable.

Last night . . . What had happened last night?

Looking around him, Draco discovered that Harry did not seem to be anywhere in his flat. Concern almost close to hysteria washed over him. Had he and Harry fought last night? Or had Draco forgotten to go to Harry's place? Was Harry okay? Was Harry mad with him? What if Harry was with someone else -

And his memories came back to him in a flash.

He fell to his knees, the ache in his heart too large to be pushed aside, painful sobs being pulled from his body, shivering in the cold morning and unable to make the pain stop.

_Oh god. I knew something like this was bound to happen. Why did I open myself up to him? Why did I allow myself to care for him?_

_People like Harry just don't expect me to even be able to fall in love._

_Or even care that they hurt me when I do._

Why hadn't he learnt that by now?

**hdhdhd**

Draco was awoken by the sound of several owls beating themselves against his window.

With a suppressed groan, he opened the window, and they piled in on top of each other. Draco was dismayed to say Harry's own snowy white Hedwig with the rest of them.

Sighing, he sat down.

He had letters to write.

**hdhdhd**

_**Draco,**_

When you get this note, please write back to me. I'm worried about you, and I'm confused. I miss you so much. Can we meet someplace? Say Hogsmeade at 8pm tonight? I know you said not to contact you again in the note you left at my place, but I need to.

_**Harry.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**Potter,**_

Haven't you caused me enough pain already? I don't want to go anywhere with you. You'll just stick knives into my heart as soon as you get the chance. Find another person who's willing to be shagged by you, Potter; I bet that Muggle man in the club wouldn't object.

Leave me the hell alone.

_**Malfoy.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**Malfoy,**_

Harry's absolutely inconsolable, you idiot!

_**Hermione Granger.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**Granger,**_

Well I'm drunk. Beat that.

_**Malfoy.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**Ferret Face,**_

I will kill you for hurting Harry.

_**Ronald Weasley.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**Ginger-top-who-has-no-money-and-is-far-less-attractive-than-me,**_

I haven't done a thing wrong and I'd like to see you try.

Now leave me the hell alone.

_**Malfoy-who-has-more-money-and-is-far-more-attractive-than-you.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**DRACO MALFOY,**_

IF YOU DO NOT _DO SOMETHING _RIGHT _NOW, _I WILL PERSONALLY COME OVER AND _ENSURE _THAT YOU DO! FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE, YOU HAD SOMETHING YOU ENJOYED. NOW GO AND MAKE IT RIGHT AGAIN!

I hope you're feeling alright, darling. I'll see you soon.

_**Love,**_

_**Mother.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**Mum,**_

I outgrew Howlers when I was 14! I'm not going to try and remedy this situation. I'm sick of it, and I didn't do anything wrong besides try to commit.

I'm feeling fine, thanks mother. And yourself? I look forward to seeing you back from your holiday.

_**Love,**_

_**Draco.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**The moronic idiot who happens to be my best friend,**_

What the hell did you do?

_**Pansy.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**The interfering bitch who happens to be my best friend,**_

I didn't do anything. Now go away and tell the rest of those big-nosed do-gooders to go with you.

_**Draco.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**Draco,**_

How are you feeling, honey? I'm sorry to hear about you and Harry breaking up. But are you sure it's something you both can't fix? You and he seem to be made for each other. Why not give it another chance? Harry wouldn't have meant to hurt you.

_**Ginny.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**Ginny,**_

Finally, someone who's not screaming at me about this entire situation. I'm alright, I guess. I think I've been drinking a little too much lately though. I haven't been able to get rid of the after effects of it as well as I normally do.

I've tried so hard, Ginny. I really mean it. And it wasn't easy.

I'm not going to give him another chance. I can't.

_**Draco.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**Draco,**_

Lay off the alcohol completely. If you don't, and someone else finds out you're going to be in so much trouble. Even more than it sounds like you're in now.

I know it wasn't your fault, honey. But it wasn't Harry's either. You know he gets a lot nervous about admitting he's with someone. He can't help it.

If it wasn't easy, then why are you giving up so suddenly? I never thought you'd be one to give up easily.

Why can't you give him another chance, Draco? You both want it.

_**Ginny.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**Ginny,**_

Who gives a crap if I'm drinking? No one. And it's nobody else's business either.

We both know that it's not admitting the fact that he's going out with someone that makes him nervous; it's admitting the fact that he's going out with me.

Well, he _was_ going out with me. I don't give anymore. Why should I even bother?

There are a lot of things you don't know about me.

If I don't open up, I can't be hurt again. That's my new policy.

_**Draco.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**Malfoy,**_

I can't believe you! How can you do this to Harry and then insult Ron and everyone else that tries to help? I'm going to kill you!

_**Hermione Granger.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**Granger,**_

If you don't intend to carry out that threat would you mind not getting my hopes up?

_**Malfoy.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**To Whom It May Concern:**_

I'm going away for a few days. I might see you all later. I'm not really sure at this point.

_**Draco Malfoy.**_

****

**hdhdhd**

This was exactly what he needed, Draco decided as he lounged around in the five star Hilton Hotel at Australia. A little time out from the world.

And Australia was the last place anyone would check for him; he and Harry had gone there for their last holiday together, and Draco didn't often go to the same place two times in a row.

_Harry … I miss you …_

In some part of his mind, Draco knew that he was being totally unreasonable; all his friends and his mother would be searching for him frantically at home, and if they found him he'd be in deep trouble. But he wasn't really up to thinking past the present moment for now.

For the past two days, all he'd done was lie around and wallow in his misery. Perhaps he was wasting time and money, but he wasn't needed at home, and Draco was tired.

Escaping was the only thing he'd been thinking of when he'd sneaked out of his flat, and in his heartbreak, the only place he could think of running away to was the last place he and Harry had been truly alone together; not that they'd stayed at the Hilton.

Draco smiled a little as he remembered Harry stubbornly insisting that he was _not _going to stay in an overpriced piece of flashy junk. In the end, Draco was glad that Harry had put his foot down; the place they had stayed at was absolutely beautiful.

He'd tried to get a reservation there before coming to the Hilton, but the rooms were all taken up.

With a groan, he rolled out of the large bed in his hotel room, and padded over to the kitchen bench.

His mother would be frantic, and Draco didn't want her to worry about him anymore than she already did. He felt a twinge of guilt about not telling her sooner, but soon shrugged it off; what was done was done, after all.

He scrawled a note telling her that he was fine, and he just needed some time out from the world on a piece of paper before charming it to apparate at her place. Owls would attract too much attention around this Muggle hotel, and Draco didn't want any of that.

His stomach growled at him, and he looked down in surprise. Perhaps he had been neglecting his body during the past few days.

He called room service and ordered several small dishes, directing the staff to leave the food in the fridge before locking himself in the small, gleaming bathroom and showering.

Draco managed to keep himself occupied, and too busy to fall bait to his grief again.

But after he'd cleaned his body, washed his hair, dried himself, pulled on clean nightwear, eaten, brushed his teeth, and collapsed back into bed, he realised something; he was wearing a pair of Harry's pyjamas.

He curled up in a ball and cried himself to sleep.

**hdhdhd**

Draco awoke sometime in the night to the feeling of someone looking him over. It was storming outside, and he was suddenly terrified. He hated storms, and it felt like someone was looking at him; he shuddered, pulled the covers over his head and firmly scolded his delusional side for freaking him out.

But the prickling feeling didn't go away; in fact, it intensified, and Draco thought he heard someone fidgeting and a slight cough.

He screamed and reached for his wand, only to come face-to-face with the one person that he did not want to see.

"Harry." he gasped, recovering from the shock of his life.

"Draco," Harry replied with a slight nod of his head. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

"I wasn't scared," Draco snapped automatically.

"Of course not," the brunette said smoothly.

There was an awkward silence.

"Harry, what do you want?" Draco asked tiredly. "I came here to get away from –"

"We were all worried about you," Harry said in a rush. "The notes you left seemed a little suicidal. I just came to see if you were alright."

Draco raised an eyebrow, and kept the pain caused by Harry's tactless words firmly hid away behind the Malfoy mask he had cultivated in his childhood. "Well I am fine, and as far from suicidal as I normally am. So now that seen all that you wanted to see, will you go away and leave me alone?"

Harry sighed. "I didn't mean it that way, Draco. We were all worried about you."

Draco glared at him. "I am as good as I can be considering the circumstance."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Harry cried. "Hell, I didn't mean to say what I said at the club! It just slipped out!"

"_Go away_ _now, Harry_."

"The only way I'm leaving is if you come with me, and everything goes back to the way it was before the club."

Draco shook his head in disgusted disbelief. "I cannot believe you, Potter."

"WHAT? I JUST WANT EVERYTHING TO BE PERFECT AGAIN!" Harry yelled at him.

"NOTHING WAS PERFECT TO BEGIN WITH, YOU BASTARD! I'M SO SICK OF HIDING MY FEELINGS! I'M SO SICK OF YOU NOT RETURNING THEM!" Draco screamed back. "Maybe, just maybe, I'll be able to get over you and find someone who actually cares for me."

There was a shocked silence before Harry let out a strangled sob, and Draco rolled his eyes despite the guilt he felt pooling up within him. The brunette sank back down onto the couch, his face hidden in his hands, shoulders shaking.

Draco sighed, and hating himself for doing it, stood up, dragged the blanket off his bed and walked over to Harry, sitting beside him on the couch, and arranging the blanket over both of them before pulling the brunette into his arms.

"I'm sorry, Harry. I didn't mean to upset you," he whispered over and over again, kissing the top of Harry's head.

Draco stiffened as he felt Harry beginning to return the embrace, and then sighed and relaxed. The blond frowned as he tried to comprehend what Harry was mumbling. He strained his hearing, and to his great shock heard:

"… 'm so sorry, Draco, love you so much, didn't want to hurt you. Miss you, want you to come back with me. Wanted everything to be _perfect, _but I screwed it up, I always do –"

_He does like me after all, _Draco thought dazedly. It was slightly too much for him to take in; one moment he was single and heartbroken, and the next, he had everything he could possibly want in his arms.

Draco realised that Harry was still muttering, so he silenced Harry the only way he could; he leaned forward, and gently pressed his lips against the brunette's.

**hdhdhd**

"I did mean it, you know," Harry said after he had stopped crying into Draco's shoulder.

"What?" Draco asked, still stunned.

"When I said I love you."

Draco smiled sweetly. "I know,"

The brunette blushed. "Does this mean that you forgive me?"

"Does this mean we can have a normal, healthy relationship?" Draco countered.

"I'm sorry," Harry muttered. "I just thought that if neither of us said it, then we wouldn't put pressure on the relationship." He looked up at Draco, eyes flashing. "I haven't had much experience in this sort of thing."

"I can tell." the blond replied dryly, but smiled gently.

"Can you forgive me?" the brunette asked, biting his lip in a way Draco found completely enthralling and adorable.

"Of course I can, you silly prat," he said softly. "I love you."

Harry laughed in relief. "Love you too."

**hdhdhd**

"Where are you going?" Harry asked somewhat grumpily as Draco clambered out of bed the next morning.

He smiled inwardly. "Just to send a note to my mother," he replied.

"Come back soon," Harry grumbled, and dove back under the blankets.

Draco laughed, and left the room, grabbing a piece of paper and a pen along the way.

_**Dear Mother,**_

Harry came after me. We're together, for real this time.

I assume that a number of people had quite a lot of influence in this event. Please pass my thanks on to them.

Harry and I are going to stay where I am for a while longer. He's trying to convince me to leave my job! But he's not the only one who wants me to, I'm guessing (yes, I'm referring to you).

We're actually talking things through for once. I don't think I could be any happier than I am right now.

He said he loves me, and I believe him.

_**Love,**_

_**Draco.**_

Draco sat still for a few moments, looking out the window. It was still raining heavily, and the weather suited his mood perfectly.

He contemplated the short note to his mother, running his fingers over the surface of the paper.

_I really want this, _he thought. _I know father used to tell me that I shouldn't give my heart to anyone because then I would also be giving them my trust, and to a certain extent, I suppose he was right. I honestly love Harry, but can I trust him after what he said back at the club? It's not that I don't want to be with him … It's just that every time he pulls away from me, I feel my hope and faith fade away._

He sighed, brushing his platinum blond hair out of his eyes. _I have never wanted something as much as I want this before. I don't think I can truly live without him. Not that I'd kill myself or anything of the kind … I'd still be breathing. But I wouldn't be living. And yet, I'm dying a little more inside every time he distances himself._

_He promised me before that we'd talk things through, and we'd have a two-sided relationship._

_But things are easier said than done._

Draco gasped in surprise when he felt warm arms close around his cold body from behind. "Gnh!" was all he managed to say before Harry's lips were pressed against the top of his head sweetly.

"I missed you," the brunette said into his shoulder.

Draco rolled his eyes. "I was only gone for five minutes," he said, as he spelled the note to appear at Malfoy Mansion.

"Too long," Harry said forcefully, gently nibbling on Draco's ear.

"If you say so, Harry," Draco replied a little breathlessly.

"I do." Harry cuddled him and then began to speak a little quieter. "Draco, I can't believe I did said such a heartless thing at the club. It was a horrible thing to say and I didn't mean it. I'm so sorry –"

As Harry continued to ramble on, Draco realised something. He'd made the right decision.

**hdhdhd**

"I assume you brought me here to tell me something," Draco said wryly as Harry brushed off one of the many waiters and waitresses vying for his attention at Draco's favourite upper-class restaurant.

The other man blushed. "Well, yes, I did, I mean, more to ask you than anything."

Draco's heart was racing. Was Harry going to ask him something he'd always wanted Harry to ask him? Could he? He leant forward across the table unconsciously, breathless in anticipation.

Harry cleared his throat. "Draco, we've been together informally for six months, and properly for three months now. You helped me through defeating Voldemort, and healed me both mentally and physically after the Last Confrontation.

"During the past few months especially, I haven't been able _not_ to think just how empty my life would be without you. I treasure every single moment I have the fortune to share with you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you, if you'll let me. I'd be nothing without you, Draco. Nothing at all.

"And so, I was wondering if you would do me the honour of …" Harry blushed, and Draco's mouth became dry, his eyes began to water, and he felt like he was choking. "getting a puppy with me."

Draco felt his heart rapidly fall to the bottom of his very expensive shiny black shoes. His lip quivered. _DAMN it, Malfoy, you will _not _cry. Not now, and not ever again._

Harry saw his expression, and bit his lip in mirth. "Draco," he said, reaching across the table to take one of Draco's hands. "Baby, I was only joking. Will you marry me?"

All of a sudden, Draco was a mess, tears streaming down his face, smearing the little eyeliner he'd applied all over his face. "Potter, how do you always manage to make me an emotional wreck?" he asked huskily, blond hair falling into his eyes as he looked up at Harry.

"I'm sorry," the brunette said, looking slightly uncomfortable, and obviously not knowing what Draco was thinking or what to do.

"Come over here, you stupid, sappy Gryffindor," Draco said, laughing tearfully. "Of course I will."

Harry knocked over his chair in haste to get to the blond, crushing him in a bear hug and kissing any surface of skin he could reach.

"I love you," he whispered into Draco's ear, and Draco laughed joyfully at him, replying the sentiment before they both apparated home and told each other non verbally many times.

**hdhdhd**

_**Dear Ron and Hermione,**_

It is wonderful to hear that you two are finally together. It only took you about nine years!

Harry and I are currently enjoying the summer sun. He says "hello", and "about time, you two"! I'm writing the letter because he's simply too lazy to. Or perhaps he's a little exhausted. _Yes, _Weasley, he's exhausted from a special sort of exercise we engage in "daily and nightly and ever so rightly" (Harry again, the Gryffindork).

Thankyou for helping us out. I'm so happy, and I love him so much. Thankyou.

We haven't really been doing much other than lazing around, and enjoying the sun and scenery, although I think I'm going make him come and see an opera or two with me. Who knows, maybe he'll like it? Perhaps not, but it's worth seeing the disgusted look on his face when I mention it, and it will be terribly amusing when he falls asleep in the middle of it, and then tries to assure me afterwards that he was 'only resting his eyes'

Once again, congratulations, and we'll see you when we all go to the Manor for Christmas!

_**Love,**_

_**Draco and Harry.**_

**hdhdhd**

_**Dear Blaise and Pansy,**_

I have a devious plan that involves you us Slytherins ganging up on three Gryffindorks on Christmas Day at the Manor for a snowball fight. Do you reckon you've still got the skills?

In other news, Harry and I are having a wonderful holiday (he says hi), and we should both have fairly extensive tans by the time we get back home.

I hope that all is well, and you two are in good health. I miss you both, and am grateful for all the scheming you so obviously engaged in to help Harry and I work things out.

It was like before there was Draco and Harry, and Harry and Draco. But only Draco-and-Harry and no Harry-and-Draco, if that makes any sense.

But now everything is working out, and I can't thankyou enough. I've never been happier.

Take care of yourselves.

_**Love,**_

_**Draco**_

**Harry/DracoForever**

_**The Beginning **_


End file.
